Sugarplum or Firefly...Which one are you?

We all know a Sugarplum or a Firefly. The Sugarplum can be described as the butter-wont-melt-in-her mouth girl, the nice one, the girl-next-door while some might describe the Firefly as the confident one, the loud one, the go-getter basically a firecracker.

My sis and I came up with these names in our final year at university. Basically I had bought a lipgloss called Firefly (coral and bright) and she had bought one called Sugarplum (pink and girly) from the same brand and somehow we used these names to personify ourselves. At the time, I thought the description was apt...I wouldn't describe myself as loud but I'm quite vocal and can talk the ear off of an elephant ;-)
While my friends seem to love me for this, its been the bane of my life where guys are concerned. The main issue is that the first impression guys have of me is that of a Sugarplum. Now its not like I pretend to be something I'm not, no. Its just that I'm usually quiet if I'm not with people I'm comfortable around and as I get comfortable the Firefly comes out to play ;-)
Then, its the 'You've changed' and the 'I'm actually looking to date someone more quiet' nonsense (someone did actually say that to me!). One guy actually told me 'I just wish I could transform you into who I think you should be, you would be so perfect' (TRUE STORY!!!)
I had this discussion recently with one of my guy friends and he was like 'Gem, every Naija guy wants a biddable Sugarplum, they dont want the hassle of a Firefly'. A friend of mine, a certified Sugarplum, also told me that to guys a Sugarplum will always be sweet irrespective of what you do to them. A firefly on the other hand is beautiful to look at but eventually its brightness and buzzing around will eventually annoy you and then you want to kill it!

So what are the Fireflies of this world supposed to do? Not shine as brightly? Keep schtum?!


I actually think most people are both Fireflies and Sugarplums...it really depends on audience and mood. Human Beings are complex like that! Its the way you wear different shades of lipsticks depending on how you're feeling or where you are going. But just like there's one lipstick you wear more than others, I know I'm more of a Firefly than a Sugarplum.

What do you guys think? Which one are you? Sugarplum, Firefly or Both? If both, which is more dominant? What hope is there for fireflies like me meeting someone who will love us for and irrespective of our 'constant buzzing and brightness'?



Have a happy weekend. Big Kiss X

Afterthought: A firefly is actually pretty ordinary during the day, but becomes a remarkable sight when it glows at night. This is a symbolic message to us humans that although our physical appearance may seem one way - it is what is inside us that makes us shine from the inside out. That which is within us will always illuminate us and those around us.